When you are poor, you work. I have never been working this hard for quite some time, well OK, I have never worked hard before but hey, who wants to live forever? Some people say, if you work too hard, your head gets bigger. That’s what I figure to be the case with some of [...]

Everyone loves picking their nose. Oh come on, don’t act like you don’t do this shit. When you got a gold hanging or stuck inside there, you dig it and even though it’s not as good as orgasm but it’s pretty close. From my observation, most people love to do it when they are driving. [...]

Another post about dogs. Everyone loves dogs, they said dogs are mans best friend. I’m not too sure bout it, I thought the penis was a man’s best friend. Anyway, the area I live in is home to a wide variety of domestic and foreign wildlife, for example stray dogs, rats, cockroaches, dragons, leprechauns and [...]

It appears that this is my 1st payment from Nuffnang. I know, I know… it seems like only yesterday that we broke onto the scene, bedraggled and drunk, ready to take on the world and, after we’d taken on the world, have a nice cheese burger and maybe a nap. And yet, here we are, [...]

I’ve had a lot of thoughts running through my head the last couple days. Not the least of which is to buy iPhone 3G or Blackberry Bold, the two closest heavyweight cellphone of the century. Every time when people talk about iPhone, they get so excited. This shit is like a marvel of the modern [...]

My Sister: Bro, where are you? Are you OK? Me: Leaving to office soon, why? You don’t call me at 8.30am just to ask me if I’m OK rite? Apa mau? My Sister: Somebody called me just now, he called me “jie” and I thought it was you. But when I look at the number, [...]

This is what everyone and their mother and their mother’s best friend’s sister-in-law wants to know on this beautiful Friday. The Top Ten Signs You’re a Regular at Open Up And Say AAaaahhhhh’s Blog: 10) You make porn look romantic. You make the Karma Sutra cry in a million different positions. And you think Karma [...]

Last nite I was drinking with some of my friends and the topic of woman came up. It is a normal topic when a bunch of dicks hanging out together and it usually prefaced with the phrase, “That chick….” then ended with “damn big” or “damm chio”. I don’t know why, half of the time [...]

I have no opinions about this movie, the poster itself, or anything having to do with adventures and what it’s like to raid tombs. I just want to take this opportunity to tell you how much I would like to touch Angelina Jolie’s boobs. Very much. I would like very much to touch Angelina Jolie’s [...]

I’m sure you handsome and beautiful readers have probably noticed a distinct lack of posts around here as of late. You all have probably been hitting the Refresh button desperately praying for new content to magically appear and end your self-soiling misery. Sorry bout that. I have been very lazy busy and I want to [...]

Tomorrow is the Fourth of July and in America they celebrate this day as their independence day. It’s the same thing as our Malaysian 31st August Merdeka except that they are actually celebrating the day Will Smith saved their ass from aliens. Those Americans are damn lucky because all those aliens used Apple computers and [...]

You go to a bar with 3 of your friends. One jug of beer costs RM70, you call it cheap, and after paying RM700 you called it getting real drunk. For some unknown reason, one of your friend is hooking up with a smoking hot chick. You are not sure if she’s hot because beers [...]

I keep checking back here to see if there’s a new post, and then I remember I’m the one who writes this horseshit. Nice. Not again. Sorry for the slow updates. Anyway, I used to play a lot of chess. Ever since I was small, my brother taught and trained me. I remember my brother [...]

When I was in high school, I briefly entertained the idea of becoming a rock star. I fueled this idea by forming a band named Damage INC which practiced four hundred and fifty times and then broke up.  I think it had something to do with the fact that because I had no musical talent [...]

Don’t ask me how it happened because I’m not entirely sure, but a couple of days ago I found myself watching, of my own free will, a couple of minutes chunk of AXN programmes. There are some good fucking shows out there. I don’t really watch TV and the only time I turn on my [...]